Having two kids is AMAZING. Better than I ever dreamed it could be. But it's also HARD. Not just a little hard, a LOT hard. I'm not going to sugarcoat it and say it's amazingly easy and perfect and my house is spotless and I clean the bathrooms and wash the sheets twice a week. No. I am going to tell you that through the incredible calling I have as being a mommy to two boys, our sheets haven't been washed in over a month. The bathrooms JUST got cleaned in over two weeks. I found a sippy cup full of milk under the couch and WHO KNOWS how long it's been there. As soon as the boys are in bed asleep (which is around 9 for Hogan) I am pure exhausted. Like, blogging is the LAST thing on my mind. And naptime around here is spent picking up cereal from the floor, feeding the dog breakfast at 2pm, and frantically trying to think of something for dinner. I feel like some days it's all I can do to keep my head above water, but you know what? It's awesome. It's HARD. Sometimes I cry. I hardly ever wear real clothes (hello yoga pants!) or put on makeup. Dry shampoo is my new BFF. If you want me to tell you my house is always clean and we do crafts and eat organic broccolli for lunch...I would be lying.
I am smack dab in the middle of the trenches of motherhood. Someone the other day at church told me "you are always so put together and you are rocking this with two kiddos!" Although that was an amazing compliment, I don't ever want anyone to think I have it all together. Some days after the boys are in bed, I just lay on the couch and almost pass flat out. It's exhausting. I sometimes leave the dishes in the sink overnight (AHH!) and sometimes I leave the clean clothes in the hamper to be folded for five days. That's my life right now. and it's okay.
Life with two is so much more hectic and messy and FULL. It's about Winslow and Hogan and raising those little boys to love the Lord and become men of integrity and truth. It's about putting the chores off to watch Winslow spin around the room in his batman cape or ride his tricycle up and down the halls. It's about listening to Hogan laugh for the first time or watching him roll over and smile. It's about dancing in the messy kitchen with my husband. I love this life and even though it is not as clean or put together as it used to be, I would never trade it for the world. I am so thankful the Lord allowed me to become a mother. It's the best job in the world. I am also so thankful for grace. a whole lotta grace.
We are finding our new normal with each passing day, and it gets easier and easier. I am so blessed that two boys call me momma and I would not have it any other way. The dishes and mopping can wait. I have two little boys who need me more than ever right now.